Monday, December 29, 2008

Update from Rebecca

Hi y’all. It has been a weird holiday. Andy and the kids went to England to visit his folks, as per our original plan. But I was not up for it so I have stayed home. It was the best solution, even if it is odd. I have been doing better and better. Tumor shrinking and stuff. Doing a bit less of the medicine stuff, because it was starting to drive me buggy keeping track of all of the different things I was doing. I am generally fatigued, but nothing hours by myself does not cure.

I have lots of friends in town visiting me and I have been going out a bit too. I do not last long at big events, about an hour. There is something about sound and vibration that disturbs me these days. Cant handle it. I already feel my pulse all over my body, like when you can see your hair move with your heartbeat. One on one, I have been doing very well.

Two days ago, I went to a friend of a friend's house. She wanted to do a prayer for me, so I said sure. It turns out that it was a Medicine Buddha Puja (that last word means ceremony). I am open to all prayers, so I sat for about 30-40 minutes. During that time, my cough kicked in and then changed to a strange sound. By the time she was done, I could not talk, as in no voice. I was very tired, went home and slept for 48hours off and on with friends coming over and helping me with food and the dog. I feel better this morning enough to come downstairs and type. I feel that this is all a good thing and my body has received the healing and is integrating it. It will take time though. I still do not have a voice, but my cough is returning to a normal sound, a bit. I am well enough to listen to the radio or watch tv now. I even had a nice chat (whisper) with my friend who came over this morning and made me breakfast. I do not know if it is a healing that is going to affect the cancer, but it is having an effect on my shoulder girdle, the place I hold ALL of my tension. The road is long and winding. (not as in a breeze, but as in curvey).

Meanwhile, I have been offered the opportunity and accepted to become and understudy of the healer in South Africa. His name is Leo, but I will now be referring to him as Sigung. From Wikipedia:
Sigung or Shigong or "Si Kung" (師公) is the sifu's sifu in a Chinese martial art school. Si means teacher. Gung means grandfather.

He is a Shaolin Grandmaster as well as a healer. That understudy has not yet begun. The first step in all healing instruction is to heal yourself first. So for all of you out there worrying about me doing something that will wipe me out, don’t worry. I will be tired, but it will be the type that is from healing, not from overdoing it. If I overdo it, it is my doing separate from the healing.

The hardest part of this for me is that there are no guarantees in life. Healing is a separate process than getting better. They can go hand in hand, or they can diverge. Healing is related to the soul, getting better is a body thing. I cannot guarantee that this healing is going to get me better in this life. No one can guarantee that in any modality I have undertaken. This is the direction I am choosing because it is bigger than me. We are all a small part in a big picture and I want to help the big picture as much as I can, so this is the way I choose. I know and trust Sigung to do what is right and think this is the best direction for my long term health.

It also means that I will come out of this (either in this life, or another) able to help others, which is all I have wanted to do. I know a lot of this is pretty corny for some of you, but I figured I might as well spill the beans before I start, so no one is surprised.

FYI, I am going to continue working with Kaiser and some other doctors, I am just not sure which ones. Sigung is going to help me with that.

There, I told everybody. That is a big deal for me.

I love you all and thank you for all of your support.

1 comment:

Alon Shalev said...

You have enormous courage. I am struck by your desire not only to heal yourself, but to be there an d help others. I am not sure many of us could climb out of our own introspection.

Y'shar Koach! May you go from strength to strength.